I’m a Relational Therapist - What Exactly Does That Mean?

Although the term is not as recognizable as “couples therapy” or “cognitive behavioral therapy”, it might not be surprising to hear that at its core, relational therapy is all about relationships—the ones you have with others, with yourself, and with the world. What does this mean in theory and in practice?

Relationships Are the Heart of Everything

As humans, we’re wired for connection. Whether it’s with a partner, family member, friend, or coworker, relationships shape our emotions, behaviors, and even how we view ourselves. Sometimes those relationships are our greatest source of joy; other times, they’re where we feel the most stuck. However, relational therapy isn’t just about “fixing” relationships—it’s about understanding how relationships shape who you are. Relational therapy helps you untangle patterns, understand how they’re impacting your life, and create healthier, more fulfilling connections.

The Therapeutic Relationship as a Model

One thing that makes relational therapy unique is how we use the therapeutic relationship itself as a tool for growth. In our sessions, we’ll look at how you show up in relationships—your fears, expectations, communication habits—and we’ll notice when those patterns appear between us. This might feel a little vulnerable at first, but it’s one of the most powerful ways to learn and heal.

For example, if you’re someone who avoids conflict or worries about being judged, you might notice those feelings come up during therapy. Together, we’ll explore where those reactions come from, how they’ve served you in the past, and what it looks like to try something new. The benefit of this is that clients can practice these new ways of being and interacting within the safety of the therapeutic relationship, where stakes are lower than in the “real world”. 

It’s Not Just About Others—It’s About You

Relational therapy is as much about your relationship with yourself as it is about others. Often, the ways we connect with people reflect how we feel about ourselves. By deepening your self-awareness and self-compassion, you’ll naturally show up differently in your relationships—and in your life, in hopefully a healthier and more authentic way.

If you’re curious about how relational therapy could help you specifically, let’s chat—I’d love to explore it with you!